Enduring Churches Podcast with Alan and Trent

Episode 38: How to Have a Critical Conversation

with special guest Luke Heirendt

 

Why have these kinds of conversations?

• Help the person get better
• Help the Church bet better
  • illustration: Seahawks have “Tell the Truth Mondays”
• Truth: It’s hard to see what we need to change in the mirror…if we could see it, we would have already changed it!

 

7 Keys in Critical conversations

1. Build trust with your team.
2. Lay groundwork for hones feedback.
3. Let a person know you are going to have a tough conversation with them.
4. Be loving and not harsh.

• Connect the complaint to the cause
• Connect your solution to their identity

Offer support. If you are going to give it, be willing to receive it. Remove your own defenses.

 

Final thought: Don’t stay quiet.

Episode 37: Hope for the Holidays

 

How does your family celebrate thanksgiving and Christmas?

 

How does your church handle the holidays?

 

Things you can do to build your hope for the holidays

1. Don’t overthink your preaching. Guests need and want a direct message; we don’t have to say something that is new. We all struggle to keep things fresh.
2. Don’t overcommit to external celebrations; it's ok to say no.
3. Keep close to your family.
4. If traveling, remember visiting family is tiring; give your self a day on the return to relax.
5. Remember Christmas is all about God’s intervention in our lives; allow Him time to intervene in yours.

Episode 36: Happy Thanksgiving/Don't Be a Turkey

 

Amy Morin's article in Forbes

 

7 scientically proven benefits of gratitude

 

1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships. 

 

2. Gratitude improves physical health. 

 

3. Gratitude improves psychological health. 

 

4. Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression. 

 

5. Grateful people sleep better. 

 

6. Gratitude improves self-esteem.

 

7. Gratitude increases mental strength. 

Episode 35: Pastoral Rest

 

SEEKING ADVICE - I'm one month shy of 18 years in pastoral ministry and I still haven't figured out how to adequately balance accessibility and availability. In other words, how do I remain being accessible (especially in the digital age) and respond to all of the messages and comments of my flock and yet also protect my time and my family's time?

 

Issue: We are more available than ever

• Most anyone can send me a message through any number of platforms and expect a response immediately and I feel the pressure to do so.

Issue: Lack of Peace

• Peace doesn’t mean that you will not have problems. Peace means that your problems will not have you.

Issue: Lack of Rest

• We can't serve tired

Practical suggestions:

• Remember the Sabbath - Jesus said the sabbath was for people not people for the sabbath  
  • Sabbath doesn't always mean a nap or worship service
  • Do something different - people who do mostly cerebral (mind)work - do physical activity or the opposite.  
  • Be still and know that I am God - and you're not
  • Travel and learn and be thankful.

• Learn to focus on the what you can control
  • My runner who was really frustrated by not being able to finish...talked about the science of what was going on; just had to control one thing.
  • Be all in while you are at home

• Disconnect as much as possible.  
  • Leave your cell phone; put down the computer.
  • give your family your best

• Equip others to help you
  • there are people who can help been call
  • church can get a cell phone account for emergencies; share that phone.

• Recognize some calls can wait
  • is it a real emergency
  • Voicemail is a good thing - let some calls go to voicemail

Wes Faulk's Blog

Episode 32: Cyber Church

 

Question:  How involved should your church be in technology and social media?

 

How much does your church use social media now?

 

Need to have someone in charge of this who will keep it updated

 

“We’re a friendly church.”  You may Be friendly to each other but are you friendly to people outside your church? 

 

Website:

•  Service Times.
• What to expect page.
• Map
• Staff.
• Is it way out of date
  • Google maps
  • Yelp reviews

 

The Big 4 other platforms

 

Facebook (30’s and up)

• Link to website
• Regular activity
• Groups
• Ads
• Facebook live

Twitter (varies as to who is on there)

• Short quips; if you have one; post regularly or leave it alone

 

Instagram (30’s and under)

• Current events and website link

 

Snap Chat (teens and 20’s)

• Monitor and set guidelines

 

Tools you may or may not know

Group me

• Use it as a tool to communicate with small groups; board members...

 

Slack

• Similar but you can share files and more information; not always free

 

Tic tok - short video clips focused on youth? (Do we need to cover this?) segment this morning on Good morning America about this platform and how to reach teen agers

 

balancing on a fine line - recent videos "Screen Agers" and "Screen Agers follow up" show that social media helps connect but it can also create anxiety.  

 

Also remember that social media is not really social and is never supposed to take the place of real personal interaction.  A personal invitation is still more effective than a facebook post.

https://www.bgco.org/ministries/leadership/leadership-contact-us/

Episode 31: Statements that Break Enduring Momentum

 

I’m just not being fed.

 

Problem: its a spiritually immature statement

 What’s under it?

• Unrealistic expectations
• Personal laziness

 

We don’t want those kind of people here

 

Problem: its goes totally against the Bible’s teaching

What’s the reason behind the reason

• A loss of loving lost people
• Fear of losing a comfortable environment 

It’s just not my gift

 

Problem:  A reason people use to avoid uncomfortable church jobs.

 

What’s the reason behind the reason

• self over organization 
• Bad practical theology 

 

We've never done that here before

 

Problem: Won't let go of the past

 

Reason behind the reason

• were very comfortable in the past
• things will be different and uncomfortable
• I won't be in control if things change